When I first arrived at the academy I was told that many of the kids had already chosen their own English name to be used in class. At first I thought that was rather convenient because every time I try to say their Korean names they laugh at me, but after hearing just a few of the names the kids chose – Wendy, Gladys, Irene, Linda, Flora – I’m starting to wonder if Korea is stuck in some sort of mysterious name time warp. The boys aren’t much better. Besides a lot of Peters and Pauls and Allens, there’s also an Alvin, Simon, and a Theo. Serious. Based on these names I can only assume that Korean kids must watch nothing but Golden Girls re-runs and classic episodes of The Chipmunks. My favorite name, however, would have to be that of a 6th-grade boy who has dubbed himself “Nike.” That’s right, Nike. That would be a little like me calling myself “Hyundai” as my Korean name. Now that I think about it, the kids may just be goofing around the same way I did when I was in high school Spanish class. After all, I’m pretty sure “Chimichanga” was never a traditional Spanish name.