Korean Hoop Dreams

If there’s one thing that makes you miss March Madness and the NBA, it’s watching Korean Basketball. Less graceful and pure than it is haphazard and frenetic, it’s a little like watching a late night pick-up game at a YMCA in the International District. Despite the lack of dunks, the lackluster attendance, and high turnover-to-assist ratios, I enjoy watching the games because a) it’s one of the few things on TV that you can understand without knowing any Korean and b) it gives me hope that one day I will be able to play on a professional sports franchise. Dunking is not a pre-requisite in this league, in fact, you could probably make the All-Star team if you are one of the few who can touch the backboard. Seriously, in this league, a lay-up is just as likely to land you in the highlight reel as a tomahawk jam. I’ve done my research and the average height of most guards is 5’9″. I’m 5’10” (5’11” when I’m sporting my awesome Adidas high tops). I’ve got decent ball handling skills, I’m pretty quick, and – not to brag – but I’ve got a fairly accurate outside shot. In fact, my nickname down at the IMA was “Shooter.” I think with a little conditioning, I could get back into game shape and make a squad. How cool would that be?

My favorite team would have to the squad from Incheon (the city where the airport is located) called “Black Slammer.” Now that I think about it, this name is actually less of a team name than it is a team strategy. The players will literally pass the ball around the perimeter and then float it in to the one black guy on the team – usually some 38 year-old guy who rode the bench in the Canadian Basketball League – and sit back and watch as he dunks the shit out the ball.

ET Land Black Slammer Roster [link]


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